Just reading Totally Un-Pc's excellent blog post entitled "A Relative of the Colonel" reminded me of some scenarios that have occurred to me in the past.
Shift work invariably leads me ending up in the local kebab shop and walking away with a heart attack in pitta bread mainly because it is quick and simple and depending where I got it from, tasty. I used to cook my own food but sods law dictates that just as I am about to heat something up or half way through stirring it an urgent call comes out over the radio and I have to attend.
I was coming out of the local kebab shop with burger and chips nicely wrapped up in polystyrene box and carrier bag when walking to the car we received an urgent call to attend someone who must have seen us buying our food and wanted us to waste it so dialled 999.
We dealt with the call which was LOB and didn't end up in an arrest. Just as I said to my mate, "Right, time for grub!" another call came out. Blue lighting it to the other side of the borough to another LOB call resulted again with no arrest.
Dejectedly I opened the polystyrene box to find a cold burger, colder than a McDonald's burger and it had sweated through leaving the chips quaggy and moist! Still, I was starving and reluctantly, down the hatch it went. I was in no doubt, that I would be regretting that later!
I get a good reception from that kebab house and they are GTP which is handy for penny saving. I've helped them out in the past with the occasional drunk who wants his kebab and wants it now but doesn't want to pay for it. Also we put quite a lot of cash across their counter as practically every nick in the area uses it.
I am supposed to get 45 minutes for break and if I've booked off for "refs" and then get called out I am allowed to take the break again and claim back for the lost food.
What does annoy me though, especially if I'm walking, carrying food or wandering round the aisles at Tesco, Sainsbury's or Morrisons looking for something to eat, are the looks and comments I occasionally receive.
I feel like I've grown a second head sometimes because of the open mouthed stares I get because I dare to shop for something to eat!
I've even had some people have the audacity to say to me "Oh, It's alright for some!" What the hell is that supposed to mean? They are in their free time, I'm working and my lunch time, getting something to eat and they say that!
I had one bloke say to me "No wonder you lot are so fat eating that!" I responded by looking into his trolley and said:
"Well, you could do with the diet version of all that in there yourself mate!"
and walked off with him probably writing down my collar number to complain about me. It's not like I had a piled up trolley, like him, it was a "Be Good To Yourself" chicken curry for Christ's sake!
On the odd occasion I've been stopped by people who want to chat or ask for crime advice. That's great, but I only get 45 minutes if I'm lucky and if a copper is in a supermarket carrying shopping he's there to buy his dinner not to talk about your rhododendrons being trampled on by next doors cat however frustrating it can be.
So the next time you see me coming out of a food establishment, please don't pass a sarky comment, it's alright for you, you've most likely had or going home to a nice cooked meal. Why not tell me where the latest buy one get one free deals are instead!
Shift work invariably leads me ending up in the local kebab shop and walking away with a heart attack in pitta bread mainly because it is quick and simple and depending where I got it from, tasty. I used to cook my own food but sods law dictates that just as I am about to heat something up or half way through stirring it an urgent call comes out over the radio and I have to attend.
I was coming out of the local kebab shop with burger and chips nicely wrapped up in polystyrene box and carrier bag when walking to the car we received an urgent call to attend someone who must have seen us buying our food and wanted us to waste it so dialled 999.
We dealt with the call which was LOB and didn't end up in an arrest. Just as I said to my mate, "Right, time for grub!" another call came out. Blue lighting it to the other side of the borough to another LOB call resulted again with no arrest.
Dejectedly I opened the polystyrene box to find a cold burger, colder than a McDonald's burger and it had sweated through leaving the chips quaggy and moist! Still, I was starving and reluctantly, down the hatch it went. I was in no doubt, that I would be regretting that later!
I get a good reception from that kebab house and they are GTP which is handy for penny saving. I've helped them out in the past with the occasional drunk who wants his kebab and wants it now but doesn't want to pay for it. Also we put quite a lot of cash across their counter as practically every nick in the area uses it.
I am supposed to get 45 minutes for break and if I've booked off for "refs" and then get called out I am allowed to take the break again and claim back for the lost food.
What does annoy me though, especially if I'm walking, carrying food or wandering round the aisles at Tesco, Sainsbury's or Morrisons looking for something to eat, are the looks and comments I occasionally receive.
I feel like I've grown a second head sometimes because of the open mouthed stares I get because I dare to shop for something to eat!
I've even had some people have the audacity to say to me "Oh, It's alright for some!" What the hell is that supposed to mean? They are in their free time, I'm working and my lunch time, getting something to eat and they say that!
I had one bloke say to me "No wonder you lot are so fat eating that!" I responded by looking into his trolley and said:
"Well, you could do with the diet version of all that in there yourself mate!"
and walked off with him probably writing down my collar number to complain about me. It's not like I had a piled up trolley, like him, it was a "Be Good To Yourself" chicken curry for Christ's sake!
On the odd occasion I've been stopped by people who want to chat or ask for crime advice. That's great, but I only get 45 minutes if I'm lucky and if a copper is in a supermarket carrying shopping he's there to buy his dinner not to talk about your rhododendrons being trampled on by next doors cat however frustrating it can be.
So the next time you see me coming out of a food establishment, please don't pass a sarky comment, it's alright for you, you've most likely had or going home to a nice cooked meal. Why not tell me where the latest buy one get one free deals are instead!
10 comments:
My favourite is pics of a police car plastered on the front page of the local paper (a few years back now) for parking on a major crossroads illegally to get food from the only store open that night, after giving a MoP a FPN for parking there earlier!
Some people just have no idea.
My friend gets the same kind of comments levelled at him when he's on duty, he just lets it go but it does nark me when you realise what you guys do & how little break you get.
Great blog too, will put a link up to you :)
rofl, I hope you paid that FPN Mark ;~)
Response Plod, they'll be outlawing meal breaks soon OR providing meal tickets for the station canteen which are adorned as follows...
"Canteen open Mon-Fri 1pm-2pm.
One £3 meal per ticket.
*Special offer* tray of chips now only £4!"
Well. We used to criticise the Fire Brigade for doing the self-same thing!
dogberry if I got the ticket I'd be slightly worried, only being 12/13 at the time!
I don't know who actually got the ticket, even though the shop is only 200 yards (or if that) down the road!
Pisses me right off the two heads look that is.
Even worse when you are stood in the queue for a cash point.
Like I'm bloody royal and don't need to carry cash or something.
Agreed PCSW! I get the look from people in the cash point queue as if to say "Are you going to let me in first?" err.... no! I need my money now, the same as you do!
I'd have thought you'd have all cottoned onto the fact you're all supposed to be robotic crime fighters. Not actually need to eat, drink, withdraw cash, breathe, have free time, be off duty, go to the loo, have feelings/a life/time off.
After all, we pay your wages donthca know!
Honestly, get with it guys!
;)
Come on GND, go to the toilet!!
I thought you knew that Police officers don't go to the toilet. You have to eat and drink to do that. Honestly.
Well, going by the post after this one, not always...!
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